Discouraged. :(

LIBRARY, DEPRESSED AND UBER HUNGRY
I am waaaay too sensitive. And I take forever when I have too many things to do! I'm mad about it.

That was a random statement. Basically, today I tried to get my college classes I'm going to take next year in order, but I still am unsure of what's coming next because it is a longer process than I expected. I need to find out if transfer credits will transfer to the universities I need them to.

It's confusing and I am not efficient! I think that I need to carefully finish each micro-task before I start another one. YES! That's the problem. Okay, I am going to put it in my goal list. I think I have six. Not my GOAL goal list, but a smaller one that entails immediate things I need to start doing, like going to bed on-time this week... etc.

I say I'm "sensitive" because I called the medical school I want to attend and they were very frank with me. Of course, frank is good... but it is scary for me to stand up and say, "I can do it" when I FEEL like I have no proof that I can do anything at all. They didn't say anything specific about my situation because they don't know me, but I connected it to the deeper feelings of fear I have that I don't have the ability. It was strong, and dark, and heavy, and I had a hard time pulling out. How am I going to keep going if I let that happen every time? My parents don't want to pay for school for me any more, which is very discouraging too, because I could be taking biology this summer, and if I can't, I don't know if my classes are going to work out. At all. So, yeah. I'm going to go and pout about it. Or do real homework, it doesn't sound so bad after all this.

x. Try your best to only do one thing at a time when it comes to studying or thinking. (Basic physical tasks is different.)