I have terrible self control problems. I don't deny myself anything, really. That can be good, but since I don't know what's good and what's not good for me, I don't always WANT the right things, so I go back and forth. Always-- back and forth between healthy and junk food, anime-binging and studying, exercising and laying around, staying up and going to bed-- it's making me such a mess. If I could just get myself in control a little better, all these problems would be so much smaller.
I found something on the internet that talks about getting self-control fixed up. I'm modifying it for myself and making a list.
1. What areas in my life are suffering and which are prospering? Do I push myself to try too hard without taking breaks for real? The whole time I take a break, I feel guilty? It's time to start sacrificing: work before play this time, and try mainly taking short breaks in evenings and longer breaks on weekends, or at least more in the evenings, so that I can be more accomplished and have sort-of guidelines about when I relax -- work before play.
2. Take time to get informed about the areas I don't have control over. For me, those are 1) connection to God, 2) studies, practice, and learning diligence, 3) exercise, 4) diet, and 5) listening to and communication with others. Not only should I be working on these things, but I should learn HOW to do better in these areas. It's no wonder I become daunted by gaining control over these goals-- they're too high when I don't know how to approach them.
ooookay, now the article is going on about denying myself things. Puh-leeeeze. I KNOW that. That's what self-control is. I don't know how to GET SELF CONTROL. Therefore I don't know HOW to deny myself things. That is THE PROBLEM. Aaaarrrg. Okay, there are some tips...
When it says self denial, it means that-- as a HABIT-- you have to make yourself into a person who... kind of... doesn't need stuff. You give things away, and make yourself do things you don't want to. As a habit. Like... all the time.
4. Become simple-- don't ask for things, give things away, don't buy things you don't need-- REALLY. Don't see this as "denial" but living necessarily. I don't have enough money for everything I want, anyway. I don't want to be the sort of person who denies herself things. I want to be the sort of person who doesn't want them in the first place. I could get used to that. But first, I have to actually deny myself stuff, until it's habit.
I thought of doing that, a while ago, but I gave it up as a rock-solid idea. It might really help me, though, and not just in the financial department. It is pretty selfish, though, in the ultimate sense, because I'm doing it for myself. :) I really don't like the idea right now.... I hate it....
5. Deliberately challenge myself with the things I'm addicted to. TV: turn on the TV for two hours and star at something in the room for two hours. Food: get a yummy piece of food on a plate and leave it there but don't eat it, drink water instead.
hmmm. I'm not sure that will work. The TV one is one of the tips. It would be okay. But with food? Denying myself food has always made me get fatter in the end. I don't know what to do....
Quotes I like that will help me: (from The Quote Garden - specifically "about dieting" and "Self Control")
Self-respect is the root of discipline: The sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself. ~Abraham Joshua Heschel, The Insecurity of Freedom: Essays on Human Existence, 1967
Not being able to govern events, I govern myself, and apply myself to them, if they will not apply themselves to me. ~Michel de Montaigne, Essays, 1588
You must admit you have self-control before you can use it. ~Carrie Latet
Do you really think it is weakness that yields to temptation? I tell you that there are terrible temptations which it requires strength, strength and courage to yield to. ~Oscar Wilde
It's all right letting yourself go, as long as you can get yourself back. ~Mick Jagger
A silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means. This is an obvious lie. Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is.... A man who gives in to temptation after five minutes simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later. That is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness. They have lived a sheltered life by always giving in. ~C.S. Lewis
The one way to get thin is to re-establish a purpose in life. ~Cyril Connolly, The Unquiet Grave
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends. ~Author Unknown
If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution. ~Author Unknown
Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. ~Author Unknown
No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office. ~George Bernard Shaw
I have gained and lost the same ten pounds so many times over and over again my cellulite must have déjà vu. ~Jane Wagner
I think I just ate my willpower. ~Author Unknown
If you really want to be depressed, weigh yourself in grams. ~Jason Love
I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with naked fat people. ~Ed Bluestone
History is apt to judge harshly those who sacrifice tomorrow for today. ~Harold MacMillan
The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. ~Dave Barry
If you have formed the habit of checking on every new diet that comes along, you will find that, mercifully, they all blur together, leaving you with only one definite piece of information: french-fried potatoes are out. ~Jean Kerr
If you wish to grow thinner, diminish your dinner. ~H.S. Leigh
Probably nothing in the world arouses more false hopes than the first four hours of a diet. ~Dan Bennett
Don't go out of your weigh to please anyone but yourself. ~Author Unknown
Movement is a medicine for creating change in a person's physical, emotional, and mental states. ~Carol Welch
I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing. ~Marsha Doble
Much good work is lost for the lack of a little more. ~Edward H. Harriman
The one thing that matters is the effort. It continues, whereas the end to be attained is but an illusion of the climber, as he fares on and on from crest to crest; and once the goal is reached it has no meaning. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Wisdom of the Sands, translated from French by Stuart Gilbert
I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. ~Thomas Jefferson
Character is what emerges from all the little things you were too busy to do yesterday, but did anyway. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
I've got a theory that if you give 100 percent all of the time, somehow things will work out in the end. ~Larry Bird
No one understands that you have given everything. You must give more. ~Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin
He who would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance; one cannot fly into flying. ~Friedrich Nietzsche
Not being able to govern events, I govern myself, and apply myself to them, if they will not apply themselves to me. ~Michel de Montaigne, Essays, 1588
You must admit you have self-control before you can use it. ~Carrie Latet
Do you really think it is weakness that yields to temptation? I tell you that there are terrible temptations which it requires strength, strength and courage to yield to. ~Oscar Wilde
It's all right letting yourself go, as long as you can get yourself back. ~Mick Jagger
A silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means. This is an obvious lie. Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is.... A man who gives in to temptation after five minutes simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later. That is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness. They have lived a sheltered life by always giving in. ~C.S. Lewis
The one way to get thin is to re-establish a purpose in life. ~Cyril Connolly, The Unquiet Grave
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends. ~Author Unknown
If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution. ~Author Unknown
Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. ~Author Unknown
No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office. ~George Bernard Shaw
I have gained and lost the same ten pounds so many times over and over again my cellulite must have déjà vu. ~Jane Wagner
I think I just ate my willpower. ~Author Unknown
If you really want to be depressed, weigh yourself in grams. ~Jason Love
I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with naked fat people. ~Ed Bluestone
History is apt to judge harshly those who sacrifice tomorrow for today. ~Harold MacMillan
The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. ~Dave Barry
If you have formed the habit of checking on every new diet that comes along, you will find that, mercifully, they all blur together, leaving you with only one definite piece of information: french-fried potatoes are out. ~Jean Kerr
If you wish to grow thinner, diminish your dinner. ~H.S. Leigh
Probably nothing in the world arouses more false hopes than the first four hours of a diet. ~Dan Bennett
Don't go out of your weigh to please anyone but yourself. ~Author Unknown
Movement is a medicine for creating change in a person's physical, emotional, and mental states. ~Carol Welch
I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing. ~Marsha Doble
Much good work is lost for the lack of a little more. ~Edward H. Harriman
The one thing that matters is the effort. It continues, whereas the end to be attained is but an illusion of the climber, as he fares on and on from crest to crest; and once the goal is reached it has no meaning. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Wisdom of the Sands, translated from French by Stuart Gilbert
I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. ~Thomas Jefferson
Character is what emerges from all the little things you were too busy to do yesterday, but did anyway. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
I've got a theory that if you give 100 percent all of the time, somehow things will work out in the end. ~Larry Bird
No one understands that you have given everything. You must give more. ~Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin
He who would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance; one cannot fly into flying. ~Friedrich Nietzsche
When I was young, I observed that nine out of ten things I did were failures. So I did ten times more work. ~George Bernard Shaw
There's nothing like biting off more than you can chew, and then chewing anyway. ~Mark Burnett
Though the barriers of life seem formidable, we find when we challenge them that they have no will. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
One saves oneself much pain, by taking pains; much trouble, by taking trouble. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827
The winds and waves are always on the side of the ablest navigators. ~Edward Gibbon, The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire
Most of us can easily do two things at once; what's all but impossible is to do one thing at once. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
If a man is called a streetsweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and Earth will pause to say, Here lived a great streetsweeper who did his job well. ~Martin Luther King, Jr.
For us, there is only the trying. The rest is not our business. ~T.S. Eliot
There are no easy methods of learning difficult things; the method is to close your door, give out that you are not at home, and work. ~Joseph de Maistre
Be not afraid of going slowly; be afraid only of standing still. ~Chinese Proverb
To go beyond is as wrong as to fall short. ~Confucius, Analects
Don't be afraid to give your best to what seemingly are small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do the little jobs well, the big ones will tend to take care of themselves. ~Dale Carnegie
Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain. ~Author Unknown
Put your heart, mind, intellect and soul even to your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. ~Swami Sivananda
Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain. ~Author Unknown
Put your heart, mind, intellect and soul even to your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. ~Swami Sivananda
When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. ~Franklin D. Roosevelt
Fall seven times, stand up eight. ~Japanese Proverb
If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again. ~Flavia Weedn, Flavia and the Dream Maker, © Flavia.com
The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running. ~Author unknown, in reference to Ecclesiastes 9:11, "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."
It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer. ~Albert Einstein
People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them. ~G.B. Shaw, Mrs. Warren's Profession, 1893
There is no telling how many miles you will have to run while chasing a dream. ~Author Unknown
Don't be discouraged. It's often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock. ~Author Unknown
The great majority of men are bundles of beginnings. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
One may go a long way after one is tired. ~French Proverb
Vitality shows in not only the ability to persist but the ability to start over. ~F. Scott FitzgeraldFall seven times, stand up eight. ~Japanese Proverb
If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again. ~Flavia Weedn, Flavia and the Dream Maker, © Flavia.com
The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running. ~Author unknown, in reference to Ecclesiastes 9:11, "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."
It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer. ~Albert Einstein
People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them. ~G.B. Shaw, Mrs. Warren's Profession, 1893
There is no telling how many miles you will have to run while chasing a dream. ~Author Unknown
The great majority of men are bundles of beginnings. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
One may go a long way after one is tired. ~French Proverb
As a means to success, determination has this advantage over talent - that it does not have to be recognized by others. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
When your dreams turn to dust, vacuum. ~Author Unknown
Difficult things take a long time, impossible things a little longer. ~André A. Jackson
Don't let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might just as well put that passing time to the best possible use. ~Earl Nightingale
Oh, that's such a wonderful site. Yay, The Quote Garden !
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