Extra Motivation

Something else:
I absolutely MUST up my game. For instance I must not yield to normalcy and loss of truth of imagination-- NSSP needs to be dreamworld-real, and affect my life in a positive way. I need this challenge internally created, to make it farther, and I KNOW IT.

PHONE JOURNAL:
fear challenge

Remind myself of the feeling when I play piano when feel good, like, the feeling was beautiful in my fingers, and sensitive and trilly and delicate-- add that to the feeling when I play in front of other people, and the improv is normal, not quite so scary even though I always hold back from that-- gotta stop myself, fear is the only reason, it doesn't go much farther than that.

You need to challenge yourself-- really hard, awful, back away? It's exactly what you need to do.

I avoid things NOW, that I actually need to try.

There's a difference between fear and danger. Take time to think about that--

seems super-- like exactly the thing I shouldn't do-- I feel tired, I feel sleepy, I want to LEAVE, I want to back away-- that's exactly what I need to do if I ever want to get better at ANYTHING. So do I WANT to, or NOT? Figure it OUT.

 

seems super-- like exactly the thing I shouldn't do-- I feel tired, I feel sleepy, I want to LEAVE, I want to back away-- that's exactly what I need to do if I ever want to get better at ANYTHING. So do I WANT to, or NOT? Figure it OUT.

here's who I want to become: the stubbornest, meanest, settest, happiest, as much as I wantest- awesomely changeable decisive stomping boot-wearing girl that I've ever been-- but in the future. The most of me. Beyond me. The new me.